Handling separation anxiety in children
By Piklo · September 21, 2026 · 1 min read
Separation anxiety is a normal stage of development, often appearing around 8 months and sometimes resurfacing later. The child, deeply attached to their parents, dreads their absence. Far from a problem, it's the sign of a healthy attachment. You support it with reassurance and consistency.
Understanding separation anxiety
Around 8 months, a baby understands that their parents exist even out of sight, but doesn't yet know they always come back. Hence the anxiety. It can reappear during changes: starting daycare, moving, a new baby. It's temporary.
Reassuring through consistency
Stable landmarks make the child feel safe: same rituals, same people, same hours as much as possible. Always say goodbye, even briefly, rather than disappearing in secret. And keep your promise to return: trust is built on regularity.
Games and rituals that help
Peekaboo teaches little ones that what disappears comes back. A transitional object (comfort toy), a small goodbye ritual, a repeated phrase reassure during separations. Put it into words: "I'm leaving, and I always come back for you."
Leaning on stories
Stories where a hero separates from their parents then finds them again help the child grasp that separation is only temporary. Seeing themselves live and overcome this moment in a book, surrounded by loved ones, reassures them deeply. Anxiety fades with time and repeated reassuring experiences.
Frequently asked questions
At what age does separation anxiety appear?
Often around 8 months, when a baby understands absence without yet knowing the parent always returns. It can resurface during changes.
Should I leave without saying goodbye?
No. Disappearing in secret deepens the anxiety. A clear goodbye and a kept promise to return build trust.
How can I help my child handle separations?
Consistent rituals, a transitional object, peekaboo and verbalising ('I'm leaving and I'll come back') all help a lot.